Dear Carl's Jr.

I am writing to address your advertisements, specifically the sexual nature of them. I think it is very wrong and very unnecessary to have over-sexualized women in your advertisements. The purpose of an advertisement is to talk about and describe your product to try and convince consumers that your product is good and worth buying. This is not what you are doing, from a consumer’s standpoint. Instead of glorifying your product in your commercials, you are glorifying the degradation and over-sexualization of women. Women were not created with the sole purpose of providing sexual pleasure for others. Women are strong and intelligent individuals and they are worth way more than just their bodies. If young girls grow up watching your commercials and looking at your advertisements, they are going to grow up believing their main role in life is to look good and please others. Commercials and advertisements have very strong effects on people, especially young people. They can alter the way young people see the world and themselves. After being brain washed with your commercials, young girls are going to lose hope in ever becoming more than their bodies. Girls everywhere are already bombarded with pictures and articles telling them how to look. They do not need to see it during fast food commercials too. Even older women feel bad about themselves after watching your advertisements. I am 22 years old, and after seeing your advertisements, I start to feel bad about myself because I don’t look like the women in your advertisements. This is crazy. Is this what you want to do to women all over the world? Make us feel ugly, fat, and worthless? If that is what your goal is, then you are succeeding. Would you want your wife, sister, or daughter starring in your advertisements? I don’t think so. Because you know their worth. You know they deserve more than to be over-sexualized. You know they deserve more than to be objectified. How can you continue to do this to so many women in your advertisements? Your advertisements are offending and hurting people everywhere, of all ages. And in doing this, you are ultimately hurting your business too. I have not spent one penny at your restaurants because of these damaging advertisements, and I will continue to not spend even a penny at your restaurants until you change your advertisements. Please take the time to at least think about the damaging effects your advertisements have on people before continuing to produce them.

xo
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General Conference

Isn't is so cool that we can all be a part of General Conference through media? Because of the internet, television, radio, and other forms of media, we can all experience conference together. Even if we cannot watch it or hear it while it's going on, all of the talks are printed in magazines. Isn't this so cool? Media can be used for such good things! A goal I have for myself is to focus on the good things in media and the things that can uplift us through media. It is so easy to focus on the negative aspects of media, but there are some really great things too.

I am so grateful for modern technology, especially during General Conference, so it's as if we are all there together in the Conference Center.


xo
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Technoference

Technoference is the term that refers to "technology interfering with relationships". We talked about technoference in our last class and it really got me thinking about how technology affects my relationship with my husband. Unfortunately, as I started observing technoference in my life in general, I realized it occurred way more than it should in my marriage.

My husband works for an IT company, so he is ALWAYS on his laptop and his phone. This is normal for him since it's part of his job, but it becomes a problem when it takes over our alone time we have together. Of course, I am part of the problem too. Once I started monitoring the technoference in our relationship, I realized that while my husband is sitting with me and trying to have a conversation with me, I'M ON MY PHONE. Like what? I rarely get time to be with him, so I have no idea why this is happening. I think it's just one of my bad habits. Also, every time we eat dinner, we eat in front of the TV. I guess we do this because it's any easy way to wind down for the day, but seriously, these are some bad habits we really need to get rid of.

Since then, I have been very conscious about when I am on my phone. I try to put it down more and focus on the one thing I am actually doing, trying to not pick it up every 15 minutes to see what's new on Facebook. Especially when I am with my husband, I do NOT use it unless I'm showing him a  funny video I saved to show him. Also, my husband and I discussed technoference together, and we decided that we would eat dinner at our kitchen table like normal people instead of eating in front of the TV so we could have that extra time to talk and catch up with one another. We also decided that when he was done with work for the day, he would try to leave his computer alone so we could spend time together without that interference. Of course there will be exceptions when he needs to work late or keep calling a client throughout the night until he reaches him, but it's already made a difference in our relationship after like 2 days. We have realized that spending quality time is really important to our relationship and our feelings, so we are making it a goal to always have some alone time every night without any technoference.


xo
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Follow up on Dr. Coyne's Gender and the Media Lecture

I apologize in advance- this is not the most eloquent piece of writing. I just had a lot of thoughts. So here they are:


Dr. Coyne's lecture on Gender and the Media was life changing for me. I don't know if it was for anyone else, but it really stuck with me (probably because everything she talked about literally described how I felt when looking at media). I have always longed for the "perfect body" that every woman has on TV and in magazines. Doing this and constantly comparing myself to others really started hurting me. I felt really bad about myself and felt pretty worthless because of my outward appearance. This is CRAZY, but I think it's a common effect of media on lots of people.

After Dr. Coyne's lecture, I decided to change. I was so motivated from what she was lecturing, I knew I had the power to feel better about myself and not be as effected by what I see around me. Right after class, I deleted every person  didn't personally know that I was following on Instagram. I used to look to these strangers that I felt had "perfect lives" to inspire me to be better. However, they always had the opposite effect and made me feel less as a woman because I didn't look like them or didn't have as cute or as clean of a house as they did.

I also decided to stop comparing myself to others (or I started trying my hardest not to compare myself to others- trust me, I still mess up time to time). Every time I have a negative thought about myself, I basically call myself out for doing it. It has extremely helped me to try and look at everyone (including myself) as a child of our Heavenly Father. This makes it much harder to criticize yourself FYI. I used to look at other girls and long for their beautiful hair or their small waist and make myself feel awful. But now if I catch myself noticing things that I admire about other people- I focus on doing that- ADMIRING. Not envying. Now when I notice something I used to be jealous of on another person, I think "Wow, she has such beautiful hair. I am so happy for her. I bet she's so nice too". (or something to that effect- that sounded cheesy) It really helps me to think about another aspect of that person that does not involve their appearance. For instance, thinking "I bet she's so nice" to myself, helps me see her as a real person and helps me think less about only her appearance. We all deserve to be thought of for more than our appearance. Appearance really doesn't matter in the end. We are all PEOPLE. Not OBJECTS. And then I think to myself "My hair is not that bad. And that is not my defining feature. I have a husband who loves me, I'm at a great school, my family loves me the way I am. They think I'm alright so I should too". I know that sounds extremely dumb but it has changed the way I live! Now, I think more about my worth than my appearance. And I focus on other people's worth too! We all have it! And that is my favorite feature about everyone! We are all doing the best we can with what we have- so let's help each other and ourselves by not comparing.

And compliment someone if you notice something you admire about them! In my experience, when I notice something about someone else that I admire and I compliment them on it, the receiver of the compliment perks up and I perk up because I have made someone's day better. Spread joy!

xo
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P.S. Since doing this, my husband tells me how much happier I seem- and it's TRUE. Comparison is the thief of joy.

PLL

Guys. So I know Pretty Little Liars came out when I was in, like, 8th grade. But what can I say? I'm a late bloomer! So I got hooked on this show like a week ago, and I'm slightly embarrassed to admit it. I think I'm drawn to this show because A) I love drama and B) I still feel like I'm in high school, so I totally relate. This is why I tend to watch lots of high school dramas like Gossip Girl and 90210. Again, this is so embarrassing but it's so real.

From taking SFL 358, I analyze every show I watch. When I was thinking about this show and how it compares to Gossip Girl, 90210, and other high school dramas, I noticed one major difference. There is pretty much no sexual content (in season 1). However, as we started watching season 2, there is more. Interesting, eh? I wonder why? Is it because they wanted more viewers? Is it because the characters got older, so they could talk about more mature themes? I have no idea. At first, I was so impressed because I feel like sexual content is super hard to escape on TV. I was thinking this is an interesting, still dramatic, show for high schoolers to watch that wouldn't influence them to have sex at an early age. But then season 2 came on. Dang it. But even if there was NO sexual content in this show, there is still such a high level of relational aggression in this show that could affect teens watching this (or people that are a little older than teens- like me).

Are there any shows for teenagers that don't feature relational aggression in them? I can't even think of ONE. Crazy. This makes me wonder if it's having an affect on me...?


xo
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P.S. Please don't tell me who A is. Thanks.

Are family values still shown on current TV shows?

My husband and I finished Fuller House in like two days when it came out and it really got me thinking about what the differences were between Fuller House and Full House. In my post last week, I talked about how I thought Fuller House was more focused on the comedy aspect and the cast-is-back-together aspect. Although it was entertaining, I wish it was more focused on family values like Full House is.

This got my husband and I thinking, so we decided to watch Full House all the way through from the beginning! We are only one season in, but it is drastically different from Fuller House. We love the cheesy lines, the cheesy music, and the family lesson teaching moments. It's adorable and we love how focused it is on the family.

This got us thinking even further. I believe Full House was mainly based on teaching and showing good family values on TV. Are there any shows on TV right now that do the same thing? I can't think of any. Even on Disney channel, I believe that these are made purely for entertainment and they do not have any real teaching/learning value. (unless I'm just watching the wrong shows) Anyway, I wish there were more family friendly shows on TV nowadays. In my opinion, everything is oversexualized and created for mindless entertainment. What do you think?


xo
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Fuller House

As you all know, Fuller House premiered this week on Netflix! I was a die hard fan of Full House, so you know I was way excited for this to happen.

So I haven't watched all of the episodes yest, but I can pretty much tell you that I love it. It totally gave me the feels seeing the whole cast (minus some characters) back together again! Especially Uncle Jesse ;)

Although part of this show is totally directed towards kids, I think this show is definitely for the adults who were hooked on the original show. This is a great example of how media companies attract and keep audiences/consumers. We, 90s kids who loved Full House, are automatically going to watch this new show because the first one captured our hearts.

I think I still prefer Full House because it was more tied to family values and I think Fuller House is more comedy-focused, but I will still watch every episode of Fuller House because duh. What can I say? I'm a true fan.


xo
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The Pioneer Woman

Lately, I have been trying to focus on the positive aspects of media because it is so easy to talk about the negative aspects. So I have spent the last few days thinking about the good that comes from media. So here is my first realization about positive media...

Media can teach you things. And good things. Skills even.

I am talking about the Food Network, specifically the Pioneer Woman. Now I have just discovered her (because her show was playing in the basement of the JFSB), but she has inspired me. If you know me, you know I am the worst cook. I will try to make things, and either they fail or they're okay. But cooking really intimidates me. And my husband's so good at it, so it's easy for me to not even try.

But I came across this show in the Food Network and it has inspired me to try. She was making a recipe (her baked ziti) and it actually looked manageable. Now I haven't tried to make it yet... Maybe I'll do a follow up post. But I am just grateful for the fact that media can give me the hope that I can successfully cook a meal for my family and it can give me the resources to see and read how to successfully cook a meal for my family.

Think about it. Media is everywhere when it comes to learning how to cook. There are TV shows like The Pioneer Woman. There are cookbooks that give you recipes to make it easier to cook. And there are tutorials everywhere online if you need help with a specific skill. Also recipes are online- another form of media.

So I am grateful that I have come across my new favorite show and I am grateful that media will be able to make me feel more confident in my kitchen and help me learn a new skill so I can feel confident in front of my family too.


xo
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The Notebook

For our weekly date night this week, we decided to do a dinner and movie date. My husband picked the dinner location and I picked the movie. And guess what I picked? Yup. I chose THE NOTEBOOK.  My husband had never seen it before and I knew I just had to expose him to this classic someday! So Friday was the day.

My husband was a little uneasy about this idea, but he was a good sport and actually paid attention the whole time. Impressive. So I couldn't tell how he was feeling about it for the whole first like hour and a half of the movie, but by the end, there were tears running down his face. He insists that it was just because of the sad old people, but he was really feeling all of the Nicholas Sparks feelings. How does Nicholas Sparks do it??? No matter what movie it is and no matter who is watching it, there are always feelings and tears involved. HOW?

I hate to be that basic girl who loves Nicholas Sparks, but if you say you don't like Nicholas Sparks, you're lying. Even my husband likes Nicholas Sparks. And that is saying a lot.

I love how movies can really draw you in and make you feel like the story line is actually happening in the here and now. And no matter how many times you watch it, you still feel the feelings! I love the drama and I love how it takes me away from my own life for a couple of hours. I think this is one blessing of media. It really gives you a way to relax and escape from the stresses of life.

My only complaint about this movie is how Allie and Noah's relationships seems so perfect and so meant to be. Although I believe that my relationship with my husband is perfect, I know it is not and no one's is. So this may lead to unrealistic expectations in a relationship, but it's always fun to hope for that in a realtionship, isn't it?

Thank you, Nicholas Sparks, for the feelings and the drama and the escape from real life. We all love you... forever.


xo
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Blessings of FaceTime

Yesterday, I was at my husband's grandparents' house and I had a realization.

My husband's grandpa was diagnosed with cancer a few months ago, and he has not been improving. He was just told he may only have a couple of more weeks left to live. Because of this, everyone in their family is trying to visit him, maybe for the last time. However, since their family is made up of 108 people, it is impossible for everyone in the family to fly to Utah to see him right now.

This is when I came to love and be thankful for media.

Usually, in my mind, I think of media as a negative thing because sometimes it's inappropriate or is simply a bad influence on our lives. But in this case, it is such a positive thing.

In the short amount of time we were at my husband's grandparents' house, multiple people in their family called his grandpa on FaceTime to talk to him and see how he was doing. Media is such a blessing. It allows those who cannot afford or are not able to buy a plane ticket to Utah to see their dad/grandpa/great-grandpa to talk to him and tell him how much they love him.

This form of communication made my grandpa-in-law so happy and so grateful. He mentioned a few times that he thinks technology is so cool because he can see people all around the world, especially family members he would not usually see, on a screen and talk to them in real-time.

This is a hard time in our family, but media is actually making it a little bit better.

Usually, when I think of media, I think of all of the negative things about it. After this weekend, I am extremely thankful for media, and I hope to use it more in my life for uplifting and positive purposes.


xo
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The Convenience of Media: Good or Bad?

So this is kind of a random topic, but it kept popping into my mind, so that means I'm supposed to write about it, right? Well here it goes.

Everything about media is about convenience. Think about how we stick kids in front of the TV to entertain them so we can get a break, think about how we write a happy birthday post on Facebook so we don't have to meet up with the person and tell them in real life, and think about how nice it is to see pictures about your brother's family's trip to Disney Land on Facebook or Instagram so you feel updated on their lives rather than actually talking about it.This convenience especially stuck out to me while I was online shopping. Think about it. Online shopping is great because... 1) you don't have to wait in line 2) you do not have to leave your house to physically go to the store 3) people don't get in the way- like when you want to look at a sweater but a huge family is hovering around the EXACT rack that you are trying to get to 4) it's easier to look online for sales in stores rather than driving to a store and realizing there is not 40% off deal like you were hoping for 5) getting things delivered to your door makes it feel like Christmas and 6) you only have to drive to the nearest post office to return your item rather than going alllllll the way to the store 7) there are (usually) so many more options online than in-stores and finally 8) online shopping makes it so you can shop at mostly any store even when there is not one close by (Ahem... we need a Kate Spade in Utah.). Also, I lied about that being the final point. Because here is the point that I really want to talk about. And it's the point that I'd like to hear your opinions about in comments. Okay here is it...

Online shopping is convenient because there is no interaction with other people.

It's odd because (you may not want to admit it out loud) but that aspect of it is really nice because sometimes, people are annoying in stores and the cashiers always try to talk you into opening a credit card with their store. However, isn't it weird that we think that's a good thing? With media, real social interaction with people occurs way less than it did before media became a thing.

Media is convenient, but wouldn't it be better to play with your kids isntead of having them watch TV? Isn't it better to tell someone "Happy birthday" in person? Isn't it better to see your brother and his family to see how their trip was?

Media is convenient. Which can be a good thing and a bad thing. What do you think?


xo
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"Perfect" People on Instagram

This week, I have spent a ton of time on social media. Maybe it's because I didn't have too much homework this week, or maybe it was because I am extremely good at wasting time and staying up later than I should. Anyway, I've been spending extra time on Instagram lately and it hasn't been very good for me.

I just got married about five and a half months ago, so I am still adjusting to married life and I'm still working on becoming the "perfect wife". I catch myself feeling like I am not a good enough wife all the time because the house isn't perfectly clean and because my husband is a better cook than I am. Since I'm already pretty good at putting myself down when it comes to failing at my wifely duties, Instagram takes it to a whole new level. For some odd reason, I have this strange addiction with following "perfect" women on Instagram because I feel like it will give me inspiration to be better. While I think this can be helpful to some people, I have found that it makes me feel so much worse about myself. I will spend a couple of hours in a day going through these "perfect" women's pictures of their perfectly clean and decorated homes, their delicious and perfect homemade baked goodies, their perfectly dressed children, and their perfect bodies... AFTER giving birth to a couple of kids. When I compare my life to theirs, I feel awful. I just sit there in my room wishing I could be them.  And this is an AWFUL way to think. No one is perfect! We all just want everyone else to think we're perfect!

I think media is great for communicating and for spreading good news around, but when you focus on everyone's "perfect" moments on Instagram (compared to all of your not-so-perfect moments in your everyday life), it's easy to get down on yourself. However, these "perfect" people have problems too! I'm sure these women weren't all professional chefs before they got married and I'm sure their houses are not always 100% clean at any given second. They just do not share these moments on social media because that's not what we do as a society. However, it's really hard to remember this while scrolling through your news feed. I am not saying these "perfect" people or their perfect posts are bad. I think they are great inspirations for me to become better. I just think it's bad if we obsess over them, like I catching myself doing sometimes.

My goal from now on is to enjoy social media, be happy for these seemingly "perfect" people, remember no one is perfect, and work on bettering myself without comparing myself. Also, I should really cut down on my Instagram use. I could even stop following some of these so-called "perfect" people so I don't think about it too much. There are lots of options!

Here's to hoping I take some of my own advice so I can be better AND happier!

And here's to burning cookies and not vacuuming for a week! Living imperfectly ROCKS.


xo
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Scandal

This week, my husband and I decided to find a new show to watch on Netflix. Our go-to show is Grey's Anatomy (that we literally watch everyday), but since we've already watched all of the seasons through TWICE, we decided to try something new. On our "Suggested" list of TV shows Netflix chose for us, Scandal was at the top of the list. And since Scandal has the same creator and producer (Shonda Rhimes) as Grey's Anatomy, we knew it had to be good! So we started watching this two days ago and here's the update:

1. We are addicted.

2. We're almost through the second season and it's been (remember) TWO days. Wow. I impress myself. Please also note that we have both been sick so we have had nothing else to do ;)

3. It really makes you think.

These first two points are pretty self-explanatory. It's suspenseful (thank you, Shonda) so obviously not watching this show is simply not an option.

Onto the last point--
This show has caused me to have many thoughts. Which is different than usual- not because I don't usually think- but because I usually do not watch a lot of shows that require you to think. I usually choose shows with dumb humor that require zero thinking, such as Family Guy. And I don't think about Grey's Anatomy anymore because I know everything about that show by heart. So I just watch it to feel all of the feelings. Anyway, back to Scandal. This required me to think for two reasons: (sorry for all of the lists)

1. It makes me think by forcing me to put all of the pieces together in order to figure out what happened. If you have never seen this show, it is basically focused around one character, Olivia Pope, who "fixes" things. She used to work for the President of the United States, so she is into all things political and spends her days thinking of ways to fix other peoples problems such as people who are being framed for murder. Olivia Pope uses her team to gather evidence regarding these cases and figures out who really did it. Anyway, that was not the best summary, but it's basically solving crimes and figuring out who did what. Therefore, this show causes one to keep track of all of the evidence to try to figure out who did it before Olivia can. (Even though no one can figure it out before Olivia because she is the BEST.) It's fun to feel like a detective. Sometimes it's fun to think while watching TV! Who knew?

2. This show makes you think about what's really going on in the world. For instance, on this show, there is a lot of corruption in the government and there are other things that go on regarding the government such as the torturing of criminal in order to receive confessions. This causes one to wonder if there is corruption occurring in our current government. Regarding the torture scenes and other awful things government personal to do others, it makes you wonder if that really happens in real life. I have caught myself multiple times turning to my husband asking "Does that really happen?" I think watching too many of these types of shows can cause people to be skeptical about the government and fear what is happening around us behind closed doors.

Overall, we love this show because we feel like we are solving crimes and saving peoples lives (and it's good to think while TV watching to exercise the brain), but at the same time, I can see how this may promote negative feelings towards our government and create skepticism in people, even if it happens subconsciously. I will keep watching and keep you updated!


xo
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